[dropcaps type=’normal’ font_size=’45’ color=’#2F6587′ background_color=” border_color=”]S[/dropcaps]ometimes a book arrives in your life before you’re quite ready for it.

So it was with Sacred Success: A Course in Financial Miracles, by Barbara Stanny. When it first came to my attention in 2014, I promptly shelved it into the category of books I “should” read. I had (and still have) much to learn about finances, but that was the last topic I wanted to tackle in those precious reading moments sandwiched between part-time work, running a household and caring for my three kids, then aged two to seven.

Why did I resist tackling a topic that had such importance for my long-term future? At the time, I did plenty of reading about parenting and self-development, so busyness can’t be the excuse. Why was I content with a classic gender division of subject matter, popping prosperity in my self-declared “too hard” basket and letting my husband take the lead on our financial decisions? (Though to be fair, he is an accountant).

According to Stanny, the issues many women have with money, wealth and prosperity, are less to do with understanding the principles of finance and more to do with our fear of – or ambivalence about – power.

After all, we all know that power and money are inextricably linked. And as a psychologist chillingly tells Stanny, “powerful women have been burned at the stake”.

Yikes. As I read those words, I was struck by the realization that powerful women have been punished for generations. We may not know it, but somewhere deep down, we carry that cultural legacy in our very cells.

Stanny argues that this fear of the potentially disastrous consequences of becoming truly powerful, keeps women playing small and holds us back from success. After all, what better way to protect yourself (and your daughters), than by giving your power away?

And how do we do that? For starters, by failing to stick up for our worth, by reducing our earning potential, by mishandling or ignoring our finances or by becoming financially dependent on another.

But what I didn’t anticipate – and what was truly shocking to me – was the many other ways I was unconsciously giving my power away on a daily basis.

Pushing away compliments or diminishing my successes and putting myself down. Blaming others or my circumstances, letting other people decide for me, saying yes when my head and heart is screaming “NO” or refusing to ask for (or accept) help. Trying to be the nice girl, the one who doesn’t mind, the one who volunteers when no one else will and after working late, stays up til 1am preparing cupcakes for the school bake sale. A self-care-is-for-sooks, just-harden-up-and-do-what-needs-to-be-done sort of attitude. Phew.

Most alarmingly of all, I realised I was routinely running ideas past my husband that I could easily have implemented of my own volition – then getting annoyed when he disagreed. How convenient it was to blame him for saying no to something I wasn’t brave enough to do for myself. Ouch!

In my defence, years of being the primary caregiver for our three children while earning little or no independent income, had undermined my sense of personal power – not because of anything my husband had said or done, but because of how I felt when I was not contributing to the family coffers.

Because this giving up our power is all very well, until it’s not. Suddenly we can find our power diminished in all sorts of other areas too – like confidently sharing opinions, or making important decisions. Besides, I’ve seen too many women wear the sharp end of the financial knife as a result of relationship break ups, solo parenthood, the unexpected death of a partner, or years of stay-at-home mothering culminating in a drastically reduced earning potential.

While reading this book, I felt quite stunned that I went to an all girls school yet we were not educated in how to look after ourselves financially. We weren’t schooled in the fundamentals of prosperity, we weren’t warned of the potentially dire long-term consequences of taking years out of the workforce, we weren’t taught how to manage finances in partnership with another.

Does anyone (male or female) learn such things in school? Perhaps not. Yet after reading Sacred Success, I feel strongly that this education ought to be offered to (if not compulsory for) every young woman. That she ought to start out in the workforce feeling empowered around her financial wellbeing, rather than fearful, ignorant, or just plain head-in-the-sand.

So how do we reclaim our power? The answer according to Stanny, is not to try to succeed according to the male model, but to redefine power from a feminine perspective. She writes

“A powerful woman is someone who knows who she is, knows what she wants and expresses that in the world, unapologetically.”

We take back our power by holding ourselves accountable.

“Ultimately claiming our power is an act of individuation, distinguishing what’s true for us from what’s been artificially imposed – by our family, or society as a whole – then letting go of what no longer serves us. What we think we are supposed to be – all the shoulds, oughts, musts – often gets in the way of what we actually could be.”

Stanny believes that our fear of power is in essence, a fear of becoming who we truly are and stepping into our greatness.

Yes greatness. To Stanny, greatness means living our truth and sharing our gifts. So what if you’re making music, styling interiors or analysing accounts instead of facilitating world peace or saving lives? True greatness is “being who you are… and it’s both a privilege and a duty.”

Reading Sacred Success has opened my eyes to the deeper value of my own work.

By helping women find their voices, embrace the power of what they have to share, bring who they are into what they do and wrap it all up in delicious words, I am in a very real sense helping women step into their greatness. And that feels mighty fine.

For as Stanny writes,

“It is each woman becoming who she is meant to be, the ultimate authority in her life, that allows her to accumulate wealth and use it as a tool to increase her choices, improve her circumstances, follow her calling, help those she loves and turn this planet into a better place.”

Now doesn’t that sound like a plan?

Have you read Sacred Success? Are you giving away your power in life or work? If this blog resonates, I’d love you to could share it with others who may benefit from it, or share your thoughts in the comments below.

If you’re ready to reclaim your power and share your gifts book your free mini-session here and let’s wrap words around your greatness.